Just another college girl fightin' the patriarchy

Do we discriminate against rape victims? You don’t think so? Really? Let’s see how it sounds if you treat a victim of a breaking and entering the same way.

“So Mr. Johnson, someone broke into your house last night, is that right?”
“Yes, while we were sleeping.”
“Mr. Johnson, do you usually lock your door?”
“Yes usually.”
“Was your door locked last night?”
“Yes.”
“Have you ever let anyone into your house before?”
“Yes… How is that relevant?”
“Well you clearly were inviting a break in with that. Not to mention the welcome mat in front of your door.”
“Excuse me? I don’t see how this is relevant since a crime was committed.”
“Well you were clearly asking to be robbed. What were you thinking with this welcome mat? Also, do you have a burglar alarm?”
“No, we don’t have an alarm.”
“Well you clearly didn’t mind being robbed then.”

How about a mugging?
“So Mr. Johnson, you were mugged last night?”
“Yes, he threatened to kill me if I didn’t give him my money.”
“But did you actually see the weapon? Did he actually hurt you?”
“No, but I didn’t want to risk it.”
“So you just handed him the money.”
“Well I thought he would kill me.”
“And you were wearing a suit. Is that right?”
“Yes.”
“Well obviously you were advertising that you were available to hand out money.”
“What, that’s ridiculous…”
“And what time was this?”
“Midnight or so. I was coming home from a late dinner.”
“What were you thinking walking around that late?”
“It’s a free country isn’t it?”
“Have you ever given anyone money before?”
“Of course I have. How is that relevant?”
“Would you say you have a reputation then, for giving people money?”
“No, not really. What about the guy who did this, does he have a record of mugging people?”
“I can’t discuss that, it’s not relevant anyways. Look there’s nothing we can do. You wore an expensive suit, late at night, and have a record of handing out money. In fact I think you should apologize for putting this innocent man through this.”

This is clearly ridiculous. But no one bats an eyelid when rapists go free based on the rape victim’s sexual history, her outfit, whether she was out late, whether she’d been friendly before, etc… Some people who have been through rape trials say it was more traumatizing than actually being raped because they were told so many times that they were lying, overreacting, wrong, etc… Studies also show that when presented with two similar rape trials, people were not only more likely to believe a woman who was a virgin, but in cases where the woman had multiple previous partners they frequently sympathized with the rapist! Rape trials are a joke. They are an excuse to parade women out in front of men and humiliate them, they aren’t seriously attempting to get justice. Rape laws in pretty much all countries disgust me.

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Comments on: "Do rape trials discriminate against rape victims?" (51)

  1. A Shropshire Lad said:

    Good try, but the real problem with rape trials is the lack of evidence and witnesses and that in the absence of such, the accused must be allowed the benefit of the doubt.

    Another interesting problem I just thought of is the fact that criminalisation of nudity as “indecency” upholds this ridiculous notion that a rape victim was asking for it if she was in some people’s opinion was semi-nude or “indecently dressed”.

    We need to decriminalize nudity and state that nudity is the natural human state and not in itself an invitation to sex. You should be able to walk through town nude without being charged with neither indecent exposure nor raped.

    • the real problem with trying to press charges/trial with rape is that people do not believe womyn and girls when they say they have been raped it has nothing the fuck to do with “lack of evidence”

  2. A Shropshire Lad said:

    BTW as a feminist bisexual male I must say I’d been more interested in the accused rapist’s sexual history than in the victim’s. If it was proved that he was a player I’d be less hesitant to convict him, because that would mean that it was more likely any sex had actually taken place and he would have been experienced enough to judge a woman’s signal. So no mercy for players!

    • Here’s SL mansplaining again:
      “Good try, but…”

      You know what, SL, your opinions do not amount to fact. You think it’s perfectly natural to just drop in with your opinions and things you “just thought of” instead of respecting this writer’s ideas. You are just blathering and not contributing to what ElkBallet has said in her post.

      • A Shropshire Lad said:

        You know what, SL, your opinions do not amount to fact.

        True, why would you think they were facts?

        I am a great believer in the Hegelian dialectic of thesis – anthithesis – synthesis.

    • dude fuck off you are NOT a feminist with your bullshit talk about fucking “players” and shit.

  3. Sirf_palot said:

    Hullo again… 😦

    I rarely seen what happen’s at rape trials deconstructed like this and you definately hit the nail on what is wrong at trial here. Now, I know this may sound a little patronizing, but “flip the chessboard” around. If you were the defense attorney, or the accused, how would you defend yourself then? (Now I know, this may sound like I’m being an apologist, I’m not). I mean, the rape kit could prove that sex happened (if its not like how the GOP described it as Rape Rape where it was violent), but its the woman’s testimony that changes it from sex to rape. Now, how is a Defense attorney going to create reasonable doubt? If we were to disallow harsh cross-examination that victims say is traumatizing, that means that anyone brought to a rape trial can be immediately convicted on the woman’s word alone. There is a reason criminal courts require beyond reasonable doubt as opposed to a civil court’s preponderance of evidence, it is the fact that we as a society (although I may not totally agree with this) decided that throwing one innocent person in jail is not worth locking up 100 crims (or something allow those line) The problem is not our legal system (at least in the US, I mean the Jap laws are kinda up), its the fact that people think that having multiple sexual creates discredibility. From an objective point of view, there is nothing to be disgusted with our legal system, it is just trying to deal The only way to fix that is through education? I mean, I bet most people only learn about rape through pop culture. For me, it was through my discovery of extreme shit when I was in middle school and I didn’t know it was illegal until I was freshman. So, I guess a proper education to counter what people learn from “culture” would help. I mean, the only time I actually thought deeply of this is when I witnessed what happened to Yuka… those bastards…. argh Snap out of it.

    Cheers. Also, if I didn’t say it before, I’ll say it now: Happy Chinese New Year (and I think Spring Festival is comming up, though I must admit, I’m quite ignorant of my native culture). Hope you all had a happy week of unseasonally warm weather (at least in NY lol).

    • It is automatic and assumed that we do NOT give consent to have someone break into our homes and take things or to mug us or physically attack us. It’s a state of non-consent we always and forever reside in merely for being human – that is, for every other crime except rape. That’s why this post is so apt. Here’s a notion: Unless women give their express, verbal consent to have sex and to have the exact kind of sex that is going to/did occur, it is rape. This would simply give women the exact same right of existing in a constant state of non-consent to crime.

      In a constant state of non-consent it is ASSUMED by everyone (the courts, the police, the government, friends, strangers, etc.) that we didn’t give consent if we are robbed, mugged, attacked, burgled, etc. and we don’t have to explain it or justify our reasons for why it upset us or answer the allegations put to us because we were robbed or burgled. Rape is the only crime you can name where consent is debated. And that’s because it predominantly happens to women and is perpetrated by men and considered to be a part of the continuum of the ownership of women’s bodies by men. This is considered a radical idea only because that ownership has been assumed and acted on for thousands of years.

      And the argument that sometimes women want to have sex and therefore, blah, blah, blah doesn’t wash because sometimes we let friends sleep on our couches and we don’t get that confused with breaking and entering. We can handle the difference between consensual sex and rape, too. End the assumption of consent for this crime just as with every other crime and a whole lotta things would change in women’s lives in a hurry.

      • Sirf_palot said:

        Well I wasn’t really saying anything that would have contradicted your statement. All I was saying that the legal system is not at fault here, its public perception (or at the very least, the jury) that is fault, because it seems that dirtying the victim the works. I also don’t believe that the legal system mentions anything about assumed consent (though I may be wrong), its just that apparently this the only way “rapists” can mount an effective defense, I mean if the rape kit proves that intercourse happened, the only way they could get acquitted is to destroy the victim’s credibility. Its horrible, but I’m afraid you still have to afford him this 6th Amendment Right to cross examine his accuser. Like I said, legal system is not to be disgusted at, its trying to make due with a very shitty situation here.

    • A Shropshire Lad said:

      I mean, I bet most people only learn about rape through pop culture. For me, it was through my discovery of extreme shit when I was in middle school and I didn’t know it was illegal until I was freshman.

      Untill I started school I mostly had girl playmates and when I encountered other boys, as a group, with their rough-and-tumble play in first grade, I distinctly remember thinking they all were rapists, because they related to my friends in a gendered way. Even greater was surprise when they slowly started dating my friends instead of outright raping them!

      Yes, I was born as a male Andrea Dworkin!!!

  4. Good try, but the real problem with rape trials is the lack of evidence and witnesses and that in the absence of such, the accused must be allowed the benefit of the doubt.

    What so if no one is around to see it, rape doesn’t occur? There’s never any evidence for a mugging either other than money is gone, which is exactly the same as showing penetration or “sex” occurred. There is a ton of discrimination against rape victims. Our culture is so good at perpetuating this rape culture that people actually feel correct when they claim there’s less evidence in a rape trial than other crimes, despite the fact that there’s rarely any evidence for any crime. Even bruises aren’t enough, because he can just say she wanted it rough. There have been rapes that were filmed (I’m not talking about porn here) and they claimed that she was just acting for a porn film. It’s sick. So don’t tell me it’s a lack of evidence, it’s not.

  5. Shropshire Lad: No, the real issue with rape trials is that we live in a fucking rape culture, under which women are viewed as little more than a collection of holes into which any old dick may be poked, regardless of whether or not she consents and regardless of whether or not she actively wants it. The real problem has nothing to do with evidence and witnesses or the lack thereof, and everything to do with the fact that no one gives a shit. Rapes are trivialized, and the women affected are silenced through infantilization and diminishing tactics. Invariably, the rapist is sided with, because surely the woman did something wrong to “deserve” it. And every possible thing she could have done or not done plays back into the construct of femininity and the patriarchy at large. Please don’t delude yourself otherwise.

    And as for your statement that you’d be more likely to convict him because he’s a player — I’d say that’s pretty ignorant as well. Specifically, this bit: “…because that would mean that it was more likely any sex had actually taken place and he would have been experienced enough to judge a woman’s signal.” And what signal is this, pray tell? Struggling to get away? Crying? Screaming for help? Shutting down? Saying no? Not responding to his advances? I find it problematic not only that you seem to think there is one correct “no signal” (which would place fault on the victim if she doesn’t express it, no?), but also that you assumed “a player” would necessarily bother to RESPECT these signals (whatever those may be).

    elkballet: This is definitely ridiculous, and I’ve noticed it more and more of late. Especially those “rape whistle”-esque forwards that go around. I am almost moved to make a shirt that says, “Only rapists can prevent rapes”, though that sounds oxymoronic. Perhaps paralleling victims or rape and burglary as you have here, would be better. Anyway, thanks!

    • A Shropshire Lad said:

      And as for your statement that you’d be more likely to convict him because he’s a player — I’d say that’s pretty ignorant as well. Specifically, this bit: “…because that would mean that it was more likely any sex had actually taken place and he would have been experienced enough to judge a woman’s signal.” And what signal is this, pray tell?

      Sorry, I should have written “signalS”, that’s what i mean. I’m a virgin, so I wouldn’t really know the signals except “No, stop!”, which is what I would have yelled if somebody tried to rape me.

  6. A Shropshire Lad said:

    It just occured to me: Burglary and assault only can serve as parallells for the phsyical crime of rape. The psychological side can best be likened to bullying. No evidence, except that it can break you down. Consent extremely thorny, because you still want to engage with fellow human beings without being bullied.

    This rings especially true to me, because I think the closest situation I’ve been in that can give me a little insight in how a woman can experience rape is a scene in secondary school in which two of the bullies who used to pick on me, cornered me and demanded I try smoking. I remember panicking and freezing, because I had never tried smoking, knew my parents had forbidden me to ever try it and was afraid of getting hooked on it.

    Luckily they didn’t go beyond verbal abuse and let me go, perhaps amused at my panicked refusal. The thing is that they were two attractive, big, strong jocks, so in hindsight I see as a bisexual, I might have experienced some sort of arousal if they had begun to manhandle me, although I absolutely hated them.

    Not because of this single incident, but because of the bullying in general I cried myself to sleep, withdrew from other people and developed obsessive-compulsive disorder and depression.

    So yes, rape is a most evil and harsh form of bullying. It’s not so much about sex as about power over somebody weaker, just like bullying.

  7. I’m sorry to hear that you’ve developed OCD and depression because of bullying, and I definitely think it’s important to acknowledge that rape is almost never about sex — no, never, period — and always about power dynamics.

    “Burglary and assault only can serve as parallells for the phsyical crime of rape. The psychological side can best be likened to bullying.”

    I disagree, though, as well as being confused. Are you saying assault and burglary can’t have negative psychological repercussions? Power dynamics play the biggest part in rape, I would venture to say, and rape and assault often occur in conjunction with one another (or are words used interchangeably), but no doubt, all of the three are immense pyschological traumas, which could *all* lead to PTSD. Rape is a hate crime, plain and simple. I would be inclined to say that “bullying” is far too weak a descriptor for the horror of rape.

    • A Shropshire Lad said:

      Of course the way people experience burglary/forced entry also varies very much. I am a male with male privilege and live in Scandinavia, where the streets are very safe. So if I feel threatened in my home I am much more likely to run out into the street instead of barricading myself in my home. Other people may feel the exact opposite.

      I would also not feel disgusted by knowing that somebody had been in home without my knowledge, as long as they didn’t take anything and as long as they weren’t “dirty” and touched my stuff! (Flashbacks of my OCD in which I believed I had been infected with HIV by buying and reading a (yes, it was on the feminist side with more text than pictures!) porn magazine!)

      Other people, on the other hand, would probably freak out from the mere fact that somebody had been able to break into their home. (I know my mother reacted that way when our house once was burglared.)

  8. “Sorry, I should have written “signalS”, that’s what i mean. I’m a virgin, so I wouldn’t really know the signals except “No, stop!”, which is what I would have yelled if somebody tried to rape me.”

    Okay, fine, I’ve never had sex either. But I don’t think you have to have done to understand the signals of someone who doesn’t want it. I’ve never, and I would understand the a rapist’s signals (i.e. I’m not going to stop) were he trying to rape me. And I also think that you would know (whether or not you would choose to IGNORE them is another story entirely) the signals other than “Stop, no!” You wouldn’t get shoving or crying? I have little faith in humanity, but I refuse to believe that anyone lacks perception to that degree. And if you’re unsure, you should ask her what’s going on.

    Gee, “sex” education really needs to be hijacked by some feminists and injected with enthusiastic consent ideology, rape prevention education (which is up to males alone), etc…

    • A Shropshire Lad said:

      Okay, fine, I’ve never had sex either. But I don’t think you have to have done to understand the signals of someone who doesn’t want it. I’ve never, and I would understand the a rapist’s signals (i.e. I’m not going to stop) were he trying to rape me. And I also think that you would know (whether or not you would choose to IGNORE them is another story entirely) the signals other than “Stop, no!” You wouldn’t get shoving or crying?

      Lol, yes, of course I would totally get crying and shoving and such. The things I am thinking of are rather the more playful aspects of sexuality, i.e. yelling “stop, stop, you’re killing me!” when you’re being tickled and actually don’t want it to stop or running away when you actually want to be caught etc.

      It all boils down again to the fine but important line between teasing and bullying.

      • SL: “The things I am thinking of are rather the more playful aspects of sexuality, i.e. yelling “stop, stop, you’re killing me!” when you’re being tickled and actually don’t want it to stop or running away when you actually want to be caught etc.”

        You’re a rapist in the making, SL. Rapists think things like “actually don’t want it to stop” and “actually want to get caught.” That leads directly to, “she said no, but she really wanted it.” That’s because you believe in your princely way that you know exactly what people are actually thinking and you’ll take that as far as you feel like, you know, because there’s a fine line in your mind between teasing and bullying. Rapists and abusers tell themselves that, SL. But the fact is, the line between abuse and not-abuse is crystal clear to people who have healthy boundaries and respect for other people. It’s men who don’t see it because they don’t want to see it. They want to be free to be abusers and rapists and have plausible excuses they can make to their buddies and women who haven’t figured out how to set their boundaries.

      • see, when i hear someone say ‘stop that’ i actually stop because to not stop is a violation of their boundaries and trust.

      • A Shropshire Lad said:

        Must be boring being tickled by you…

  9. EW! 2 resident mansplainers!

    i propose that we eliminate PIV-as-sex entirely. that way, there would be no question as to whether it was “consensual” or not. if a man stuck his dick into a woman, and that woman did not wish to become pregnant, it would be clear to absolutely everyone that it was rape.

    PIV-centric sexuality normalizes men sticking their dicks into women. women are supposed to have dicks stuck into them, at all times, or as often as possible. if NOT having dicks stuck into them was the normal state for women, things would look much different than they do today, in a lot of ways. men of course do not want this to change, and they DO want women having dicks stuck into them to be normalized. because all men benefit from having the line between “consensual PIV” and rape very blurry if not completely nonexistant.

    they can mansplain all fucking night and into the next day about “the problems with rape” but the one thing they will NEVER do is give up PIV, and PIV-centric sexuality. even though thats probably the only thing thats going to work, to eliminate the “problem” of consent. this tells us everything we need to know about men, and what they REALLY consider to be the “problem with rape.” namely, that sometimes men go to jail for rape.

    • A Shropshire Lad said:

      i propose that we eliminate PIV-as-sex entirely. that way, there would be no question as to whether it was “consensual” or not. if a man stuck his dick into a woman, and that woman did not wish to become pregnant, it would be clear to absolutely everyone that it was rape.

      Lol, I am sure you and the Pope disagree mightily about abortion, but on this point you and him would find yourself (and very few other men or women on Earth) in agreement!

      • Oh no, FCM, he compared you to the pope!!!!

        Like I said, it’s fun having him around to watch the ideas fly over his head.

      • A Shropshire Lad said:

        Like I said, it’s fun having him around to watch the ideas fly over his head.

        OK, just give up all hope of making normal, “red-blooded” men understand feminism then, if a bisexual male feminist-theory-consuming man like me fails so miserably to get it.

        And I understand your audience is women and you don’t need men to understand, except that somebody said here that only rapists can stop rape.

    • A Shropshire Lad said:

      i propose that we eliminate PIV-as-sex entirely. that way, there would be no question as to whether it was “consensual” or not. if a man stuck his dick into a woman, and that woman did not wish to become pregnant, it would be clear to absolutely everyone that it was rape.

      Haha, fine with my, as my penis is an inch smaller than average anyway. It can probably do the job of making a woman pregnant, but it’s not exactly the super-size human dildo that fun-feminists rave about as their entitlement if they condescend to have sex with a man. 🙂

    • FAB Libber said:

      PIV-centric sexuality normalizes men sticking their dicks into women. women are supposed to have dicks stuck into them, at all times, or as often as possible.
      and
      because all men benefit from having the line between “consensual PIV” and rape very blurry if not completely nonexistant.

      Yes, absolutely. PIV-centric society is a rigged system (against women, and for rapists).

  10. A Shropshire Lad said:

    Womyn, two points to consider:
    – As I explained, my mind went into Andrea Dworkin-mode the moment I encountered hetereosexuality. In first class in primary school, when the boys treated my mostly female friends in a gendered way, i.e. chasing them around as animals instead of playing with them as equals, I was convinced they all were rapists. Does that mean I was born a feminist or that the shock of discovering (hetero)sexuality made me project my own thoughts and desires onto the other boys?

    – Since you go all ad hominem at me, I’ll go ad feminam at you and ask you if you perhaps only have experienced the male specifies in the form of players and jerks, since some of your statements sound frankly grotesque to a dork/nerd like me. Perhaps you need to explore that other half of the male species?

  11. Faithless said:

    SL, I don’t mean to be offensive, I’m just honestly confused — when you say, “Does that mean I was born a feminist or that the shock of discovering (hetero)sexuality made me project my own thoughts and desires onto the other boys?”, what you’re asking is, Am I a born feminist or did discovering heterosexuality make me realize my attraction to females, and your “desires” here then would be rape (?), which you projected onto them?

    As for the second point of consideration, I, personally have encountered both the players and the jerks and the dorky, nerdy types like yourself (and I’m just a 15yo girl living in a small town, so I’m going to assume that all of the women on this blog have met males of “all different types”). Now the question would be, do there indeed exist different types of males, or are you all inherently the same? Inexplicably, I think, growing up males and being subjected to the societal conditioning that comes with that, all males will be similar, at least in the area it matters: which is privilege, entitlement, the patriarchy, etc…

    I sense that you’re not welcome here, and I personally have no desire to take up so much space on elkballet’s blog, but if you’d like to talk more on the issu, I’d be open to e-mailing you; and if not, that’s fine as well.

    • A Shropshire Lad said:

      SL, I don’t mean to be offensive, I’m just honestly confused — when you say, “Does that mean I was born a feminist or that the shock of discovering (hetero)sexuality made me project my own thoughts and desires onto the other boys?”, what you’re asking is, Am I a born feminist or did discovering heterosexuality make me realize my attraction to females, and your “desires” here then would be rape (?), which you projected onto them?

      Lol, I am confused myself, because I don’t know where those thoughts came from. I mean, I can’t recall thinking of my female friends that way before I was exposed to my male peer group. I had no desire to rape them. But I interpreted other boys’ interest in them as a desire to rape them. Perhaps it was due to the rejection I felt when my female friends preferred an obviously gendered boyfriend to me, her non-gendered playmate?

      I sense that you’re not welcome here, and I personally have no desire to take up so much space on elkballet’s blog, but if you’d like to talk more on the issu, I’d be open to e-mailing you; and if not, that’s fine as well.

      I appreciate your offer and recommend you for being such an articulate 15-year old! But I think it’s best our exchanges stay here on the blog. I mean, why not? It’s not like we are taking up place and stopping rapists and rape victims from telling their stories, debating and understanding what they did / what has been done to them.

      Let me teach you some male privilege: You are unique! You don’t take up place! The world has a right to hear your opinion!

      • A Shropshire Lad said:

        Thinking of it, and considering that I didn’t even know the details about sex when I interpreted signs of heterosexuality as rape, I think the warnings we as kids got about “kidnappers” (child molesters) might have been wahat triggered it.

        This was in Norway ca. 1990 and we walked to school (a a few miles back and forth, in a group) so our parents were not over-protective like many of today’s parents who drive their kids to school, but they warned us about “candy men” who wanted to kidnap us and do horrible things to us.

        Needless to say we never encountered any kidnappers or child molesters, but perhaps the hysteria surrounding it damaged me for good?

  12. Faithless said:

    “And I understand your audience is women and you don’t need men to understand, except that somebody said here that only rapists can stop rape.”

    Also, that was I, and I stand by that statement.

  13. Many of us have heard it all before, SL. Your every comeback, comment, and inanity has already been covered by Derailing for Dummies. Read ’em and weep. Or don’t. You can continue being a laughingstock or you can figure out how to stop being one. Your choice.

    • Ah the derailing thread. Love that one. Thank you for linking it! 🙂

      Only rapists can prevent rapes

      Why is this a bad point? You can’t blame victims for not trying hard enough, it’s totally illogical.

      • A Shropshire Lad said:

        It is not a bad point at all, it is the truth. But it means that this is very much a men’s issue too and not an issue where feminists can say “you’re a man, you dont’ understand, so f*** off.”

      • It’s a men’s issue in that men do almost all the raping (even of other men) and that needs to be acknowledged. I wish there was a way to say that without sounding so, I blame all men for rape. It is, however, something all men can help with in the elimination of the rape is cool mentality. Such as calling out other men for rape jokes, making sure that everyone knows roofies are not cool and NOT OK. Correcting people when they talk about what a slut a rape victim was, or how she should have known better than to wear that. More men need to start doing this.

        And by all means, feel free to discuss here. I’m enjoying reading what you two have to say.

      • A Shropshire Lad said:

        Fortunately I don’t know any men who are like that and who I can call out, but I will help spread the saying that all rapists who rape drugged victims must be necrophiliacs.

      • A Shropshire Lad said:

        I am so glad that my heroine Andrea Dworkin also describes drugged rape as “necrophiliac” in her account about her horrible Parisian rape experience.

    • A Shropshire Lad said:

      Thanks for that link. I read it and found it very enlightening, just like feminist theory. I don’t think I ressort to most of the petty tactics described there, but I obviously suffer from the “Yes, I’m privileged, but I’m not like the other privileged folks, so listen to me, because I’m soooo unique”. I clearly admit that’s me.

      Perhaps I’d be more willing to take a back seat if there actually were more cis-gender males (interesting and useful new concept to me) joining the debate here to debate the issues from a “real male” perspective (and that is needed, e.g. only rapists can stop rape), but obviously there isn’t.

  14. Rape laws in pretty much all countries disgust me.

    Me too.

    • A Shropshire Lad said:

      They will always be skewed, so perhaps the best solution is to simply criminalize sex, at least heterosexual sex that doesn’t serve procreational ends. Any unmarried hetero couple caught in the act are to be fined or jailed for raping each other!

    • A Shropshire Lad said:

      Consider it: I’m a virgin so it wouldn’t make any difference to my sex life. And from reading your posts and your blog, I gather it would have spared you from much rape and abuse.

  15. A Shropshire Lad said:

    Something that just struck me is: If a man feels himself falsely accused of rape, why doesn’t he counter the woman’s accusation with reporting her for rape? That would have been an interesting rape trial! Does anybody of any examples?

    • A Shropshire Lad said:

      It was not a counter-charge, but here in Norway a woman was sentenced to 9 months in prison for oral rape of a sleeping man in 2005.

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